Why Does It Feel Good?

There are many things in our natural world that are, for lack of better phrasing, quite natural. Some of these natural things make, help, or allow us to feel good. When we have hunger, eating food makes us feel good. When fatigued, rest makes us feel good. So, together, let’s take a look at BDSM and see why some many things in BDSM can make us feel good.

D-S

Domination and submission. Domination and submission lends itself to the "natural order" of things in the animal kingdom. Take a wolf pack for example. Within the wolf pack there are dominant males and females. Others within the pack submit to them. This dominance and submission lead to the benefit of the pack. In the human kingdom, dominance and submission can have similar benefits.

S-M

Sadism and Masochism. Giving and receiving of pain. Biology and physiology are intricate things. The human body is remarkable. It is set up in such a way that when we receive pain, the body has its own ability to make some pain relievers. We call these endorphins. There is also adrenaline that is released when we are excited. Adrenaline has the ability to magnify our senses and the sensations we feel.

Now let’s put it all together. How does it all work? As humans, we have natural cycles of ups and downs. Think biorhythms here. We have, and feel that we need to have, periods of excitement and increased activities, as well as, down periods, likened to an emotional roller coaster. We also have the ability to feel bodily sensations connected with our sexualities that are pleasurable. Because of this mental connection to pleasurable sexual sensations, we also gain pleasure by merely thinking about sexual things or by dressing up to "look sexy". In BDSM, a dominant can "force" a submissive to dress to look sexy or to perform in sexy ways without any sexual contact ever taking place. These actions build pleasurable feelings in both the dominant and the submissive. There is also the "control" aspect of the dominant over the submissive. When the dominant "makes" the submissive do something sexy, this allows the submissive to be "released" from the guilt that might normally be felt, thus increasing the pleasurable feelings. These pleasurable feelings are on the up side of the roller coaster. The dominant should have the ability to build these positive feelings, emotional and physical stimuli, until a point, and then let the submissive come down without crashing, thus completing the cycle. Submissives need to remember that dominants need down time too.

Finally, yes, BDSM has close ties to sex and sexuality because of the intimacy and emotions and sensations involved. But, it is not only about sex.